I'll cry it out..this too shall pass..

it's been almost a year since we met on FB...it was a great start since I've noticed that we like a lot of things alike and he's a very sensible person to talk to. That time we were both "heart broken" and the talks and chats we had helped us both in finding our individual smiles..then i found myself smiling because of him..I long to talk to him..see him on the webcam..hearing his voice.. Too bad on my part I may have become very pushy and I started demanding for his time which I know was wrong but I can't help it..He was like already a habit..a part of my day..like the air I breathe.. Things had become rocky and we stopped talking and getting in touch for a while though we still exchange status comments and wall posts on Facebook. I knew what I was starting to feel then is a dead end..would go nowhere.

So I deleted him on Facebook, I said to myself there's no way I'm gonna let myself fall and be broken again because of someone whose very far from me and I know I'll never get to see in person...days and weeks past..Then came my birthday..there was a promise from him..a promise I never thought he would fulfill..The next day, my phone rang and an unfamiliar number displayed..I answered the phone and to my surprise..with the blissful feeling.I heard his voice..His voice through a phone call was the only thing I asked of him as a gift and and he kept his promise.. we talked for roughly 20 minutes but it felt like his voice resonating on my ears..and my heart..I was so happy then and I had to add him back to FB and we started talking again..Not as much as before..but it was enough for me..I said to myself..no to expectations anymore..we're friends and that's all we could ever be..

For the next few weeks, everything was fine..I stay addicted to facebook and had ocassional chats with other people..even with another guy named Chris. I just let him be with his life. One day I received a message on Facebook from him..it was 5am in the morning when I read the message on my phone..he was apologetic and asking for understanding..he met this girl whom he likes so much..and they're dating already..he was worried that I would get jealous and would think that because of him dating again and being happy again because of a girl would make me feel alone again..I only said.. "i'm happy for you"....

That time..am I really happy for him? yes I was happy for him..part of my prayers is for him to be happy and have a girl who would find how great of a man he is..but inside me is a girl, screaming so loud because of pain..a pain nobody would want to feel..just like the how a song says..it stabbed like a thousand knives in my heart..but I have to keep it to myself, cried myself to sleep for weeks then..every after we talked about her and how happy he is with her..but as a good friend..I have to make him feel I'm there to listen and I'm there to support his happiness..

Again weeks past, we've been busy..the pain subsided..I had bought my own computer and had my own Internet connection in my house thus giving me more time to be in front of the computer and talk to other people as well to him. His relationship with this girl had become rocky and unstable and of course like any good friend..I stayed with him...listened to his rants..felt his pain..

I started to get his attention again and we had more talks than ever before..I shared laughs and tears thru Skype, "just like the old times"... I looked forward to speaking, chatting and hearing him again. It felt like he's really close..I assured me he's always there for me when I cry..he told me he loves me..

It felt like heaven..I knew I loved me and I am important to him..but as a friend..but regardless...it made my heart scream for joy and put everyday smiles on my face..

Now at this moment..I'm feeling pain again..this stressful life we both have takes toll to our relationship..we haven't talked in a while..It seems like he's avoiding me but he said he just wanted to be alone...why do you wanna be alone? do you really wanna be alone or you just don't wanna talk to me or see me..it hurts..i felt this before..because of you..but here I go again..do I ever learn?

I wish I could ignore you or forget about you as easily as you've done with me...it's just not fair and I don't know why I care...I don't know what tomorrow would bring us both..I just really pray and hope that I don't have a frail heart..I get hurt every time and I never learn from all the heartaches...if this would be the end of everything..even our friendship..so be it..I'll cry it out..this too shall pass..

SpongeBob Mood Badge

SpongeBob Mood Badge: "Put the SpongeBob Mood badge on your page."

"50 FIRST REACTIONS".

This is called the "50 FIRST REACTIONS".
Just simply type what comes to your mind "FIRST" whenever you hear these 50 words. Don't think twice and don't go back to change your first answer. It really doesn't matter how random your answer may be, just type it!

There's no wrong answer.

Re-post it for the sake of all your "BORED" friends.

OK!

1. Beer: san mig lyt.

2. Food:chicked

3. Relationships: huh?

4. Your CRUSH: :)

5. Power Rangers: corny

6. Life: is worth living for

7. The President: oust!

8. Yummy: him :) hahaha!!

9. Cars: i can't drive

10. Movie: new moon coming soon

11. Halloween: wishing for less calls

12. Sex: haven't had it for a while! hahah!

13. Religion: catholic

14. Hate: hypocrites

15. Fear: growing old alone

16. Marriage: a dream for me

17. Blondie: foreigner?

18. Slippers: spartan! haha

19. Shoes: chucks

20. Asian: pinoy!

22. Internet: necessity

23. My Cell Phone: can't live without it anymore

24. Smoke: used to it

26. College: sometime ago, miss you college friends

27. High school life: badminton buddies

28. Pajamas: ok

29. Stars: night shift

30. Fitness Center: wish i can get to one now

31. Alcoholic: nt anymore

32. The word love: makes me smile, makes me cry

33. Friends: hard to find

34. Money: i'm always broke :(

35. Heartache: been through a lot

36. Time: slow

37. Divorce: no

38. Dogs: not an animal lover

39. Undies: necessity

40. Parents: will take care of them

41. Babies: Angelika and Aia

42. Ex: former. whatever!

43. Song: Again by lenny kravitz

44. Color: red

45. Weddings: blech

46. Pizza: Pizza Hut

47. Hangout: house

48. Resto: fancy

49. Goal: to be the best mom for Angelika

50. Inspiration: Angelika, daddy and mama grace and mon

--from ellaine morales' note

Quiambao opens up about verbal abuse during marriage

Link

kawawa naman pala si miriam quiambao :(�

trying this out..

changes...

it's been 3 years after we started talking again...we lost track of each other after i lost my cellphone then..i was surprised when a familiar name sent me a message through FS asking for my number.. and so there goes the friendship again.. just like before we started texting and talking over the phone again till the wee hours of the morning and i would even sneak up my cellphone so we can send messages though i''m working...we shared laughs, a lot of meaningful conversations and even tears.. i cried with him when he was in despair after breaking up with her GF of two years..but then again ..maybe nothing will stay the same as they are.. the past few weeks had been very stressful and busy for the both of us...then he met a new friend..

since then he seldom send messages or call me..we rarely see each other.. well maybe that's life..roles change..priorities change..nothings permanent except change.. kinda hard to accept but i have too.. though it saddens me..i have no choice but to accept it..it's just hard to deal with everyday again if you got used to something then all of a sudden it's not there anymore.. he may say he never left my side, but that's not how it feels...

if he'll come to read this blog..i want to say that for me nothing wil change..though we may not talk or text or call each other everyday.. i'll still be here when you'll need me.. :(

The team jojo a. Gerry's Grill invasion

Because the team did a very g0od job last m0nth for our stats,here we go again!pig out time!

The last time,we spent our hard earned m0ney @dampa macapagal. I think we spent 6k there and we feast over buttered shrims,baked clams,sinigang sa mis0,squid,liempo,tempura and t0ns of rice..glutt0ny m0de enabled!hehe!

Last m0nth since we met our targets 4 csat,aht and lost h0urs,if i remember it ryt,we gained 7k w0rth of s0dexh0,that's a l0t! M0st of the team passed our gridd sc0res and jojo had wide smiles on his face of c0urse!

So yesterday,we had lunch at gerry's grill g5. Our shift ended @ 9am so we had to wait till 10am for the restaurant to open. Unf0rtunately chedo wasn't able to j0in since her daughter has a sch0ol activity he needed to attend to. So off we went to g5. It was so embarrassing @ first since din and bry t0ld us that they were t0ld that there's n0 gerry's @ g5. James offered to just use his card @ guilly's then he'll just take the s0dexho. We were already sitting and we've arranged the seats then jojo called asking us to transfer to gerry's w/c is on the other side of the bldg! Hahaha! Embarrassing indeed.,

We transferred to gerry's and helped ourselves with kare-kare,crispy pata,squid,calamares,tuna belly and grilled chicken with t0ns of rice of c0urse (i did n0t eat rice,im so pr0ud of myself,hehe!). It was a fun day with the team.h0pefully we meet the targets again so we get to spend m0re times like this. :)

stress attack

It's been three weeks since we've had this schedule..and up to n0w i'm still n0t used to it..the past few days i've felt so tired,so sluggish,ann0yed,bl0ated,u

nc0mf0rtable..

I kn0w it's part of the j0b,but the heavy v0lume of calls,demands to meet the targets sc0res..they're really starting to get into my nerves..shit!

I haven't had decent sleep f0r the past three days..i w0uld c0me h0me,take a sh0wer and go straight to bed...i'd sleep right away because of exhausti0n fr0m w0rk and travelling..but aftr three h0urs,f0r three straight days,i w0uld wake up,and will n0t get the chance to sleep again till the nxt shft..

The c0ming m0nth will be a very busy m0nth as f0recasted.. I just h0pe that i'll get to rest and sleep aftr a very exhausting day.. I just h0pe i w0n't get sick because of the stress and tensi0n i feel right n0w..aftr this m0nth,h0pefully i can find a breather.. I'm just s0 tired.. :c

forwarded message

This is very inspiring..it made me think a l0t after reading it..

In life,we always search f0r answers because we want to pr0ve to ourselves that we had made the right decisi0n..

But the truth is,we cann0t search f0r what's n0t there..

Things happen because it's meant to happen..

That's why we f0rgive the pe0ple wh0 hurt us..

We love pe0ple wh0 d0n't l0ve us..

And we smile every f0r every painful breaks of our hearts..

At the end of the day, the less0n y0u'll get are the answers you were searching f0r..

So true,ryt?

time off...

this has been the longest time i'm out of the office since i was employed on 247..
i filed for a 3-day VL coupled with the 2-day restday...

during those five days..i spent most of my time in the house of course and more time with Angelika..she started going to school and as an excited mom i'm the one who brings he and stays with her until her class is done..

i went back to school laat Thursday but it was reall uncomfortable for me to work then since i felt discomfort with my eyes..

the following day, i decided to go to the ophtalmologist after Angelika finished her class..but because of heavy traffic going to the hospital, i missed the doctor's appointment, that time, i can't barely see with my left eye and it's almost shut.:( ..i wasn't able to give my TL a call since i fell asleep because I was home before 5..i was awake for 26 hours starigh with a red, teary-eye! so i was tagged as NCNS, it was past 10pm when i woke up and saw my TL's messages, late notification, hate it!!

the following day i decided to go to the nearest eye clinic (so as not to miss the appointment again!!).. was given antibiotics and advised to rest my eyes for 3-5 days..so i'll be coming back to Work Tuesday..

hopefully there will be no health problems in the next 6 months..my TL's going to kill me!! :)